Charleston Fire

June 9, 2008

As someone with a background in sports journalism, I love a well-told story. ESPN’s Outside the Lines news program recently produced an excellent feature on the Summerville, SC basektball team. One the assistant coaches on that team died in the tragic furniture store fire of June 2007 in Charleston. If you have 15 or so minutes, it would be worth your while to watch this heartwarming story.

First Part

Second part


Most Men are Cowards

June 6, 2008

Now that I have your attention, feel free to get punched in the mouth by this “encouraging” message from Mark Driscoll. Press the play button.

Feels good doesn’t it?

gladiator-crowe.jpg“So what is masculinity?

It’s a willingness to lead, assume responsibility, and be a self-starter. Masculine men take initiative. It’s an inclination to despise passivity and do the right thing. It’s a willingness to stand alone and be unpopular. It is a desire to protect and to provide for one’s family and those who are weak and disadvantaged. It requires courage, honor, and the willingness to sacrifice, even if necessary, one’s own life for the good of others. That’s masculinity.

The world thinks you’re masculine if you’re a street fighter. The world thinks you’re masculine if you take steroids and look powerful. But those kinds of activities don’t make you masculine. You can be the toughest guy on the block and biggest guy in the gym and still be feminized.

True masculinity is not valued in our culture. It is shunned and mocked. The media and academic elite want men who have been worked on by a vet. They want only hardworking, driven men who are very, very sensitive. But when those two planes hit the Twin Towers on September 11, what we suddenly needed were masculine men. Feminized men don’t walk into burning buildings. but masculine men do. That’s why God created men to be masculine.”

(Steve Farrar, King Me, 120).

myoungfrontkick.jpgThe following list comes from Stever Farrar’s book, King Me, which if you haven’t read, I would highly recommend for fathers of boys. Fathers, think about these as you shepherd your sons.

1. A self-disciplined son learns to control his emotions and drives. In other words, he can put a cap on his anger and exercise control in his sex life.

2. A self-disciplined son respects authority, even when he doesn’t agree with it.

3. A self-disciplined son grasps the value of future reward over immediate gratification

4. A self-disciplined son has learned to see outside his own little world of his own needs. In fact, he sees it as his honor and duty to sacrifice to meet the needs of those he loves.

5. A self-disciplined son is a self-starter. He doesn’t need his mom to get him up every morning so that he won’t be late for his senior English class.

“Now these are goals, they don’t happen overnight. But when a dad faithfully, consistently works with his son – ‘trains him,’ as the Bible calls it – over the years of his son’s development into manhood, he will begin to see the fruit. (Farrar, 98)

All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards, it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness. (Hebrews 12:11)

There is no greater joy than to see the fruit of discipline in your son’s life. There’s not greater happiness than when your son becomes his own disciplinarian.

And that’s when your son will take off like a self-propelling rocket.” (Farrar, 98)

*Disclaimer* – Being a Karate star does not necessarily mean you are self-disciplined. Also, being self-disciplined does not automatically make you a Karate star…

Adam the Homemaker?

September 24, 2007

“Then the LORD God took the man and put him into the garden of Eden to cultivate it and keep it…Then the LORD God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone; I will make him a helper suitable for him…So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and he slept; then He took one of his ribs and closed up the flesh at that place. The LORD God fashioned into a woman the rib which He had taken from the man, and brought her to the man.

The man said, “This is now bone of my bones, And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”

For this reason a man shall leave his father and his mother, and be joined to his wife; and they shall become one flesh.

And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed” (Gen 1:15, 18, 21-25 NASB)

There are three truths that I’d like to briefly touch on in this well-known passage of Scripture.

1. God created Adam to be the primary caretaker of his home (v.15) – Contrary to popular belief, the man’s primary responsibility is not to be the primary provider for the home. His primary responsibility is to be the primary provider as well as the primary keeper of the home. Often in culture, especially cultures steeped in Christian ideals, we hear of “man’s work” and “woman’s work.” The man is to go out and make a living while the woman is to be the primary homemaker. However, the Bible is clear that Adam was given his home, Eden, to “cultivate and keep.” He is to work it and make sure it stays in good shape. Therefore, husbands are called to both work and provide for the family and maintain the home.

2. God created Eve to help Adam take care of the home (v.18ff) – If the man is called to both work for the family and maintain the home, that is a giant undertaking. Obviously, man can not do that himself. Therefore, God gave him a helper named Woman, whom Adam later nicknamed Eve. Woman’s “job” is to help the man maintain the home and work for the family. Does that mean women can/should work? That is up to each individual family…the man should work…the woman is the helper.

3. God created Adam and Even to be joined together in every way (v.24-25) Most importantly, a husband and wife are a team. They become one person. They also become more and more like each other every day. Even more importantly, they are to leave their parents and cleave to each other. Whenever there is conflict between families and spouses, the husband and wife would do well to side with and support each other (provided they are not sinning).

Christian men are called to be the leader and provider of the home and that does not just mean calling the shots and making money…it also means giving himself for the entire family. My prayer is that men will follow this Biblical model of what a husband should be: providing, caretaking and becoming one flesh with his helper